Small Talk During a Sheva Brachos

769. Small Talk During a Sheva Brachos

Kos shel brachah (lit., cup of blessing) is the designation for the cup of wine used for Kiddush, Havdalah and bentching (after-blessing on bread meals) and other occasions. Special concentration is required by halachah for this cup of wine, and there should be no hefsek (interruption, primarily with speech; see Halachah #603) from the time the leader raises the cup until the wine is drunk. This ban on talking applies especially to the leader who makes the brachah, but also to all those who are participating—even between brachos and even if they are not saying the brachos along with him. This is because the distinctive quality of this kos shel brachah compels us to treat it with respect and not be mei’siach daas (become distracted) from it.

During Sheva Brachos (the seven blessings recited after feasts for a bride and groom during the week after their wedding), it is common practice these days to honor different guests with each brachah. This may be a lengthy process, but it is still proper for all those reciting the brachos to remain silent until the kosos shel brachah—the cup for bentching and the cup of wine for sheva brachos respectively—are drunk so as not make a hefsek. There is an added stringency that all the mesubin (other participants) should respect the silence, though the common custom is to be lenient in this regard.

Me’ikar hadin (according to the letter of the law) those listening to Havdalah may speak at the conclusion of the brachah on the wine—“ah gutte voch!” (Have a good week!) is a popular adage for this time. Nevertheless, it is good to be stricter with a hefsek and wait until the wine is drunk before talking in order to show respect for the wine of blessing. Indeed the custom is to refrain from wishing “ah gutte voch!” till after the wine has been drunk.

The same applies to Kiddush by day: those being yotze (fulfilling their obligation) shouldn't talk from the time the Kiddush cup is lifted until the wine has been drunk.

https://halacha2go.com?number=769

Practical Halacha: One minute a day. By Horav Yosef Yeshaya Braun, shlita, Mara D'asra and member of the Badatz of Crown Heights.